We speak with emotion but write with intellect? Express your selves.?

Vijay Tendulkar noted writer (Marathi) had said that "There should have been a weapon in my hand instead of pen" this was said around 10 years back when he was 80. In his interview he said that I still stick to my words and also said that When I sit to right a novel or play I am tatally a different person. I will not use those words in my writing. I feel desperate, seeing few of such people after doing all those hollowcast are still living a good life with out any repentance...